Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
