It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
