why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
