i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You had me at "let me see your balls"
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
