i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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