Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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