BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize