the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
He uses pillows to masturbate.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
