This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
