I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
this is an emotional support booty call
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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