All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
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