just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
