i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
