nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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