Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
COCAINE IS GR8
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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