UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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