I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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