I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
