I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
