I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
