my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
