Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
