He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
