he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
