You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
