She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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