if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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