Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
literally had 100 drinks last night.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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