So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
