i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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