well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
