PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Green mimosas i think yes
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
