The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
