When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
