this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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