Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
