just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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