So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
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