I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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