party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
