escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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