Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
