Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I have feelings that need drinking.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
