My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
