I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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