i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
