The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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