If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I wear drunk well.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
