How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
