Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
